Almost Free!

So, I've had a credit card since I was 18. Before I ventured away from the homeland, my parents made sure I had an "in case of emergency" card. To me, that translated into "in case I'm hungry and want Texas Roadhouse", "in case I find an extremely cute shirt", "in case I really need a new pair of shoes". Well, actually in the beginning I was really frugal with my shiny silver piece of plastic. It wasn't until about 18 months/2 years ago (and two new cards) when I decided to use it a little more freely than I should. Mind you, I by no means was or am a shopaholic. I'm a lot of holic's but not a shopa.

I did however make a few rash purchases that landed me a couple thou in debt. My last tax return (of a little over 2 grand) went straight towards the revolving balance that I once never had (yes, I used to pay the balance off each month). A washer/dryer purchase landed me another grand in debt and various odds and ends-mainly bars and food put me further behind.

I'm saying all of this because two years and several times of "almost" having my various cards paid off, I'm officially $170.00 away from being debt free. And let me tell you, it's an amazing feeling. With that being said, this experience has provided great lessons.

1. Budget, budget, budget: when splurging on huge purchases like a washer and dryer (or new wardrobe), plan out a pay schedule so the balance is paid off in a somewhat timely manner- before finance charges start amounting to more than the original purchase. This is extremely difficult, yes, I know. Before every social outting, I allow myself a preset amount of cash to blow. And almost at every outting, I end up whipping out the plastic. Leave it at home. When the cash is gone, it's gone. And unless your propositioning yourself to the savvy gentlement to your left, it'll save you a headache in the morning.

2. Don't buy it if you can't afford it: So Murphy's Law more than likely will apply here. If you can't afford it, more than likely you're going to need it. Like a root canal or hell, even groceries. But if your stargazing at the latest boots that will set you back a pretty penny, save up that hard earned cash and feel good that you haven't given into a whim.

3. If you have extra money, apply it towards the card: I think this is the tip that I should've (key word should have) utilized the most. If I had extra money at the month, part whent into my savings and the other half into my stomach (I'm a sucker for restaurants and booze). But that $300 I spent last weekend at various pubs and bars (and the boy's new shoes) would have paid off the outstanding $170.00. Not too mention, would have looked damn good in my/our savings account.

Believe it or not, I'm pretty good with money. I keep a certain amount of money each month (mind you, I only get paid once of month-stupid Congress) in my bank account for emergencies (I'm a tad paranoid). So when I get down to the wire, I stop spending money. Whether it be the 15th of the month or the 28th. And I've learned, this is when I bust out the credit card. Recognizing the error of one's ways is the first step.

I'm hoping 2010 is a great debt-free year for me. Crap! Debt-free and new mortgage are not synomyous... in fact. I believe their antonyms. Oh well, I can at least try and manage those plastic cards a little better.

It's a sad, sad Wednesday

"After all, if growing up is war, then the friends who grew up with you deserve a special respect. The ones who stuck by you shoulder to shoulder, in a time when nothing was certain, all life lay ahead, and every road led home"- Wonder Years

It's a tad nostalgic at my home tonight. Actually, it's more than nostalgic, it's just plain sad. Christmas is packed up and put away, but that's not the reason sadness is in the air tonight. This Christmas marked the last Christmas my roommate and I will spend together. No, not the boy roommate. The best friend roommate. In a couple of months if all goes well (fingers crossed) the boy and I will move into a house of our own (one that does not come with jumping spider/cricket creatures in the basement or leaking pipes) and live happily ever after...or so we hope. This also signals the end of my tenure as co-tenants with M.

Our friendship started off in the most peculiar way. She decided to entertain extracurricular affairs outside of her current relationship and I ended a 10 year relationship and immediately jumped into another. We bonded over bottles of wine, a horrible break-up with her ex, and my overall lack of interest in my then relationship, followed by two months of pretending I was single when I was actually dating the boy again. We worked together, played together, and eventually moved in together.

In an essence, M and I are the perfect couple. She cleans, I cook. She's emotional, I'm practical. I encourage her to act reckless and childish and she reminds me that I'm an adult and should act accordingly. We balance each other out like wine and tequila...oh wait, only in our world does that balance out.

While we were packing up, I reflected over our relationship. I rewinded to three years ago when weekdays and weekends drifted together. Dinner was whatever we felt like ordering from Panera that night and we lived two doors down from R (who I love just as much as M). We drank too much, laughed too much, and lived too freely. We got ourselves into some unfavorable situations every now and then but together we pulled through. As I sit here and lament life as it used to be I force myself to remember that life today is not unpleasant by any means. We have real jobs and steady, healthy relationships (probably for the first time ever). But we rarely find the time or money to dine out anymore. Wine bottles are opened only on the weekends and even then we aren't up until the sun rises anymore. This growing up business put a damper on our easy breezy lifestyle.

Things are changing once again in my world and I'm thrilled at all of the new adventures that lay ahead especially since a wonderful man will be accompanying me on this journey-but I know one thing for sure- my first home away from home was the apartment I shared with M and now my home is the house I share with M and... boy, I'm sure going to miss home when I move again...

The highs and lows of a twenty-something...

"Never let go of hope. One day you will see that it all has finally come together. What you have always wished for has finally come to be. You will look back and laugh at what has passed and you will ask yourself...'How did I get through all of that?"- Wonder Years

I ended 2009 with a bang. I'm engaged (yes ladies and gents, the boy popped the question over Christmas) and nearly indebted to the federal government for 30 years thanks to my (almost) new mortgage loan. I also entered 2010 with a bang. And NOT a good one. I'm a victim of pure stupidity and lack of moral character. I lack the common sense and my perpetrator (affectionally known as perp from here on out) lacks the moral character.

I understand further explanation is needed at this point. My future in-laws and my Mom came to Baltimore for a visit today. The boy (maybe I should start calling him the man since we are now engaged...nah, I like boy better) and I took them to Famous Daves for a nice lunch. And it was nice, I could barely move when we left. Which is probably why I left behind the something of grave importance (nooo...not my new shiny ring)... my bag- complete with wallet.

Skip the hours of food coma and viewings of numerous decorative choices for the new house and at 8:30 I received a rather friendly, yet alarming email from Bank of America advising of irregular card activity. Thinking nothing of it, I log on to my account to see not one, not two, but 5 pending transactions totally a lot more money than I would want to give away. I immediately freak out, and yes, I mean I'm on the verge of a complete melt down, when I realize I never picked up my purse from the back of the chair...pure stupidity. I jump on my cell to cancel my three Bank of America cards and grab the roomie's phone to dial up Discover to cancel that card when the boy yells down that FD has my purse. Two cell phones in hand and I'm headed out the door only to arrive back at FD to find that the perp has actually stolen my purse...lack of common decency rather than moral character I suppose. While it was in FD possession at one time, it has completely disappeared (well it disappeared for a short time as it reappeared at two gas stations, a liquor store, and a rite aid right around the corner).

A bajillion phone calls later and the sniffling back of tears, I've learned a very hard lesson. I need to start taking something for my memory and people in general just suck. I would NEVER EVER steal another individual's belongings especially their hard earned money. Hell, I just donated 5 bags of clothes to goodwill.... wasn't that enough giving for a bit?

I'm hoping this is not the precursor to my year to come. I'd like to think this is just a glitch in what is going to be an otherwise pretty awesome year but I'm slightly skeptical at this point. What's that old saying, something about experience being the best teacher. Well, I've been schooled. I think it is safe to say I'll be double checking that the items I bring with me, leave with me. Goodbye 2009, Hello 2010. Look at that, I kept the rambling to a bare minimum...

Boy Meets Girl...In Their Bathroom...Every Morning

"Over the course of the average lifetime
you meet a lot of people. Some of them
stick with you through thick and thin.
Some weave their way through your life
and disappear forever. But once in a
while someone comes along who earns a
permanent place in your heart” -- Wonder Years

Boy meets girl in 7th grade. Girl thinks boy is tall, dark, and handsome-of course, all according to 12 year old standards. Flash forward a decade and some change and boy and girl (who are now "grown" and will be considered as guy and gal, as they are not quite old enough, or married, to be considered man and woman) are living in a very spacious house. Complete with "guy room" filled with mini fridge, large t.v. essential to adequately play two gaming systems, surround sound to echo the woes of Call of Duty soldiers dying at video game controlled hands, and scantily clad cheerleaders plastering a wall or two... rambling? maybe, a little...

So, guy and gal are living happily together right? Half-right. Well, 85% right. Gal loves living with guy 85% of the time. Below is the break down:

100% of the time minus:

3% of the time when guy leaves socks, shoes, dirty clothing, etc. strewn about rooms other than the aforementioned guy room (although, I'll give a percent or so back if money is found. Gal likes morning coffee and is trying to maintain a budget. This is considered free money and does not count toward budget).

2% of the time when guy "forgets" and leaves his glass on the coffee table causing their dog (because someone once let him drink out of their cup) to tip over said cup, spilling the contents onto the newly purchased, very fashionable, hardly usable (because it's mostly stained on one side due to the dog), rug.

5% of the time when both laundry baskets are vomiting their contents onto the floor and guy is glued to the television, video controller in hand, even though guy has been home 45 minutes longer than gal because she went to the gym and then ran to the grocery store to pick up dinner.

1% of the time when guy fills the room (again, room other than his very own guy room) with pungent odors that would choke the dead and cause gal to flee the room for safety (a.k.a. fresh air).

4% of the time- this is the miscellaneous category. This includes gal having to wake up and go to sleep with ESPN on the television, guy eating the last of gal's favorite cookies, and guy refusing to watch sports on his guy room television when gal REALLY wants to watch HGTV on the downstairs tv so she can plan out their future home.

Sarcasm and humor aside, I really do enjoy living with him. We've been together almost half our lives and I can't imagine picking up anyone else's dirty boxers. I love waking up to the smell of breakfast on Saturday morning because he's thoughtful and loves me (and can only cook pancakes and eggs). I love that he's added my favorite movies to our queue on Netflix and he'll wait 6 weeks, without complaining, for me to watch the movie because he knows I have to be in a certain mood to concentrate on a tv for more than an hour and a half.

The struggle to live together was really nothing more then a misconception born within a preconceived notion. The preconceived notion that nothing was really going to change since we had been "technically" living together (misconception) for years. However, and this is a HUGE however, at some point we always allocated the other some "alone time"; albeit whether it was actually alone or with friends, we knew in the back of our minds we each had our own place. And I do miss having my own place from time to time, in fact, at one point I sat outside on our steps, sobbing to my mom, screaming about how messy he is and how I was stuck and had no where to go (a bit over dramatic? nooo, not me, never!).

5 months and two paint changes later to our room and we're now in search of our forever home...or at least our "5 year starter" home. And when we move in there, I'm sure my fairy-tale dreams of a dish-free sink will be shattered once again within days, but you know what, I'm just looking forward to eating a breakfast I didn't cook, with a man (er, guy) that I love at our kitchen table...completely naked.

Time to give in and go play Call of Duty ( I secretly love that game, don't tell the guy, shit, he reads this)...oh well, I've rambled on way too long.

Jess 1, Real World 0

Growing up is never easy. You hold on to things that were. You wonder what's to come. But that night, I think we knew it was time to let go of what had been, and look ahead to what would be. Other days. New days. Days to come. The thing is, we didn't have to hate each other for getting older. We just had to forgive ourselves... for growing up. -- Wonder Years

I've toyed with the idea of blogging for over a year now. I've set up an account twice and then sheepishly backed out at the last moment, similar to the stereotypical situation where the red rose lapel wearing man stares aimlessly around, in search of the woman donning her red rose (meanwhile, she has snuck out the back door of the restaurant)-wait, did I start to ramble already?

Back on subject-so today, I've taken the plunge, unlike the lady who snuck out the back door, and have decided to commit to this blog. While, I couldn't commit to a particular topic (I contemplated one revolving around the politically savvy, but my wiser better-half suggested otherwise, although politics will creep into my writing from time to time, reader beware!) I've decided to blog about the life of a twenty-something.

Twenty something is an interesting age group. It's a decade of transition. In my case, the transition is from college graduate to adult. I'm responsible for earning wages, appropriately dispensing said wages to various bills, saving for my future home, all the while attempting to maintain my twenty something lifestyle (rich in moderate (not quite fine) dining, the latest fashion trends and electronics, and a nightlife).

It's a period of getting to know yourself-I've found out I have above average culinary skills and I'm not quite as scared of marriage as I once was (yes, gasp!) And while the idea of "growing up" is still terrifying to me, I'm enjoying this transition period, this getting to know "me" period. As should everyone in their twenty somethings. At this point, life can take you wherever you want to go. It's the time to challenge your base, expand your mind, and take the chances that you wouldn't necessarily be able to take when you're forty something.

Don't get me wrong, being an adult can utterly, for a lack of better term, blow at times. I have credit card debt, I can't decorate my room in polka dots or other fun "girl" decor because my live-in boyfriend refuses to sleep in purple sheets, and when laundry hasn't been done in a month, I'm the one slaving over 6 loads. But all an all, the entrance into adulthood hasn't been too painful. I have a decent job (one that I love actually), I live in a decent neighborhood (with a man I love), and I'm walking a clearer line between social drinker and alcoholic. Yeah, growing up might just be okay.

Well, I've rambled enough for today and my boyfriend is biting at the bullet to read this, as I've shooed him away because I can't type while he's standing behind me-wait there I go again rambling....