Hindsight

Facebook is the ultimate stalking device. As I was perusing stalker central today I came across a facebook status that went from 'in a relationship' to 'single' and then back to 'in a relationship' in a couple days time.

The basis of the break up was a lie about something trivial but nonetheless the hurt party felt the lie strong enough to discontinue the relationship. I don't know the ins and outs so I'm passing no judgement. This is not their first break up, nor their second, and probably not their last.

It did propel me into a series of flashbacks of our relationship. Fighting in general is not fun. Making up after a fight...well that can be fun. Constantly fighting for the sake of fighting is just a toxic relationship. Especially when one party knows they can just say "fine, I'm done with this then" and the "at fault" party immediately caves. I knew things were getting serious, I mean really serious, when during one of our fights neither of us threw that phrase into the argument.

When you have that easy out, that go to play and you don't take it progress is happening. And I would imagine the above relationship just hasn't reached that level yet. The level when winning fairly means more than winning at all, or more so, admitting defeat because you're really in the wrong.

I can honestly tell you since we've taken that card off the table our relationship has been better than ever. Maybe it's because we know we're stuck with each other and fighting over something that doesn't really matter just isn't fun anymore. Maybe we don't care as much who's right or wrong, or maybe it's because we've matured a bit.

I don't envy their road ahead. It takes awhile to retire that play. It takes determination, dedication in a relationship, and some growing up to do. Though they'll never even read this post, I'm rooting for them.

Wacked Out Budget

The hardest part about being a twentysomething, or at least in my opinion the hardest part of being a twentysomething is budgeting. Or in our case, the lack there of. I thought we had somewhat of a budget down until I printed out our bank statements and went through each page to find out exactly why we were so poor 7 days into the month.


Fast food restaurants and coffee joints kill our bank account. In the last 10 days we've spent $174 at various ff places. Most people don't even spend that on food in one month, let alone 10 days. And I wish I could tell you we were fine dining but unfortunately dunkin donuts and starbucks and the eateries at our respective work places have pretty much monopolized our stomachs.

We are constantly struggling to maintain our twentysomething lifestyle while still putting a little money in savings each month. And I do mean little. More importantly, the boy and I have very different views on how much should (or shouldn't) be saved each month. He holds true to the belief that we're young and crazy and our bank account should reflect that. Being more of a pessimist, I'm worried about some sort of disaster rendering us homeless and hungry.

Needless to say our finances are a hot mess. We're searching for a middle ground, a young and adequately prepared center. So in a desperate attempt to compromise on our spending habits (I'm as guilty as he is), we're going to resort to good 'ole fashioned cash for food and bar purposes. That way when it's gone, it's gone. We'll have tangible evidence that we're staying in our budget, rather than guesstimating after each debit card usage.

We've also switched to a bank that will offer a little more than .89 cents interest each month on our savings account, will reward us for using our debit card (we're still going to use our card for gas, groceries, that kind of stuff), and will refund us for any atm that charges a fee. We're getting things together, slowly but surely. Budgeting for two is a helluva lot harder than budgeting for one. That is fo' sho.

I Heart the Fall

And here's why:

Less humidity- Hallelujah, my hair loses some volume

Everything pumpkin- Lattes, bread, muffins, cheesecake, scones, beer, I love it all. Beer the most. Okay, maybe lattes the most. Oh what the hell, they are tied.

Vests- Yes, vests. Yhey are perfect for this in between kind of weather

A warm cozy bed- This is a double edge sword. I absolutely, without a doubt, hate getting out of bed in the morning. but I sleep the best in a pocket of warmth that is my bed this time of year.

Boots- Hello boot season! I've missed you oh-so-much

Halloween- Halloween parties, halloween candy, costumes...yes and please!

Football- My house is already filled with smelly dudes drinking way too many carbs. But I wouldn't have it any other way.